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July 3, 2005
Gas and Orgasms
Filed under: Masturbation — Babe Christie Cocks @ 12:51 pm

LOL, whacky title for a post huh? :) Well, I had a comment on the last post and here is my thoughts on the following.
This is Quoted from Peter and I’m going to tear it apart. :) with answers..well MY answers.

{oh and in answering the original question of the thread. this is nonsexual i guess but why do girls vehemently deny ever farting? a bunch of girls i talk to say they would die if they ever farted. and why do girls go to the bathroom so often and what exactly do they do there? it is actually a theory of mine that girls go there to fart because let’s face it, everybody farts.}

Personally, I don’t deny that I have done it. I’ve never really been asked by a guy though, if I do fart. I will go out of my way to go to the bathroom though and do it, especially if I’m with a guy I like, or even a female friend, that I don’t know all that well..I personally would have to be with someone for a while before I would fart in front of them…Matter of fact, I’ve had an old boyfriend who used to - first thing in the morning, go to the bathroom, turn on the exhaust fan and let er rip..yea i heard it and silently laughed my ass off!..but didnt dare breathe a word about it at the time, since he obviously wanted to avoid embarrassment.

I don’t think that is why all girls go to the bathroom “so often” though. Personally, I have been known to go in and check my hair, if I feel there might be something out of place. Taking extra time as though I had to actually go..PLUS long enough time to “wash my hands” lol. Sometimes we go alot to fix our make up, or if its a couple girls, you might as well plan on having half of your night out with your girlfriend and HER friend..spent alone, because that is probably the scenario. Chances are, we’re talking about our man…especially if he farts in which point, he may find himself completely alone with a “Dear John” on his answering machine waiting on him when he and his stinky arse get home. haha

{but getting back to sexual stuff, i guess a question of mine would be what girls think about during sex. and another question would be why do girls fake orgasms, and how to spot it if theyre faking. so many friends of mine have said they have faked orgasms numerous times with their partners. what i never got out of them is why they felt like they needed to do that and how to tell if theyre faking. this brings to memory that scene from when harry met sally if you ever saw that movie. i guess i was lucky with my ex in being able to tell that she actually orgasmed because her area would pulsate whenever she had an orgasm. maybe it helped that i was a trooper and if she was taking longer then normal i would still keep at it until she succumbed to that beautiful wide open mouth moan that i would love seeing. anywho enough about me, what does christy have to say about this? }

I’m afraid I haven’t seen the whole movie When Harry Met Sally ( I have seen sleepless & u’ve got mail). I have been known to fake an orgasm or two and he was none the wiser. I’ve gotten quite good at it actually (used to do phonesex! hehe). Sometimes, well, for me.. I just want to fuck and get it over with. Not all women like to take 2 and 3 hours at each and every sex session and if I can get my man off a little quicker and get the other things done that I need to do, then I’ll do every trick in the book to get him off and get on with things. That might sound horrible, but I’m sure that no men have ever just - wanted to fuck.

I think that if a female fakes an orgasm for her man, to me, must feel alot for him - and is maybe afraid to say what she really wants in bed…or it could be like me and well, still the same may apply as well. If he wants to have sex and I really don’t want to, but I do just for him..that has to say something right? Well, not necessarily in a bad way either.

I think a man would feel worse if he was made to believe he was a lousy fuck..then if the girl leaves him to feel that way ( that he is), then I would either try to talk about it - see what she really wants..or seek a new partner…ALTOGETHER.

As far as what we’re thinking? Well, I can only speak for myself. I occasionally, if I’m having troubles getting off, will think about my favorite porn or ask him to stimulate my clit while I suck his cock. LOL That always works for me ;) If I’m totally into a man I might, if not focusing on cumming, look at him in adoration and notice every precious thing about him. (that’s probably where those steamy bedroom eyes come into play).

As far as telling whether or not she is faking it - well that might be a bit difficult. Especially if she is good at it. I’ve been asked “is it live or memorex” before … He couldn’t tell and I wasn’t about to. HOWEVER things you could look out for IF you have been with the same partner for a period of time is:

1. Louder than normal moaning.
2. Over-exaggerated facial expressions.
3. Alot of really explicit talk, that might have normally not happened before.

This is just from my personal experiences, so that doesn’t hold true for all females, of course.

PS-This is fun..ask me more! lol “Dear Christie”

8 Responses to “Gas and Orgasms”

  • Martin Says:

    I’ve decided my goal is to be the first person to post a reply, as often as I can at least. Could this be two in a row?

    I dig the frank replies, Christie. It’s always good to get the answers to questions from somebody who is ‘in the know’. I’m amused that you used to do phonesex. The stereotype presented in the media is of course that the girls on the other end of the phonelines look less like you do and more like I do. Your phone-buddies probably had no idea how great they had it.

    So what’s your favorite porn? Any chance we’ll hear about those dreams anytime soon?

    I’ll try and think of a good, insightful, probing “Dear Christie” question for you for next time. At the moment, my mind is too consumed by the thought of you stimulating your clit while you suck cock to think of anything else. It’s all your fault!

  • Christie Cocks Says:

    Well, in regards to sterotypes concerning phonesex and the media. I don’t feel that phonesex is so much about the persons looks, as it is the fantasies. Many many men know that they’re buying a fantasy really and not actually talking to the girl in the magazine.
    ON the other hand, I have seen many many women on the internet who do phonesex and do look gorgeous. I know for a fact these women are real. I think there are far too many sterotypes. Religion for example. Would it turn men off to know that I’m actually a Pagan? So be it. I don’t wear a pointy hat and don’t have any warts on my nose, but that doesn’t mean I’m not a witch. ;)
    My favorite porn movie and this is so sad..It’s an old old one. Senka - anything with Senka in it, course i do remember seeing one about a cook in a restaurant masturbating on a turkey and serving it to a bitchy customer. lol
    Anyd thank you for responding too by the way Martin. Always a pleasure! ;)

  • Martin Says:

    I think you’re right about stereotypes, but they’re hard to avoid. Personally, I’ve never actually called a phone sex line (I’m too cheap) and, present company excluded, never known any phone sex operators. So naturally, all my impressions will be influenced by the media, for good or ill. Mostly ill, as you’ve gathered, but that’s the media for you.

    And personally, I think you being a Pagan is a bit of a turn on. Not to bring up stereotypes again, but it conjures to mind the phrase “sky-clad”.

  • Peter Says:

    So here is a “dear christie” for ya: what about giving blowjobs do you like so much? and why aren’t you my girlfriend? ;) i don’t think i have ever heard of this before. the two positions i’ve heard my female friends take on this topic was either a) they hate doing it and avoid doing it all together or b) they don’t mind it, it doesn’t take too long, and they usually get an orgasm returned. but you giving head for YOUR pleasure? wow. that is revolutionary. you must spread this word and infect every girl with this. what small town are you from? im moving there. i do enjoy some 69. i imagine youre a huge fan yourself
    oh and yes, masterbating on turkey is quite hot…..haha. i don’t think one’s religion has much to do with sexual excitement. most overly zealous people are hypocrites anyways. i didn’t know there were stereotypes for phonesex operators. but if any job had a bad stereotype, you would break it by just getting the job
    as for the fake orgasms, i don’t think females should have to do it. if they fake because the boy isn’t doing what she likes then faking won’t change a thing. fuck the man’s pride. she doesn’t have to say that the guy is lousy, just tell him what she likes. or if hes ignorant or hopeless then he can just masterbate while single. same idea with “fucking to get it over with,” if hes horny and the girl is not and wants to do other things, he has a left hand ya know. girls should have the courage to say, “go rub one out” if they aint feeling it. or a quick bj or something if theyre up for that much. but i guess doing that would get you horny because youre weird :) i try to switch roles and be there just for her sometimes and if my particular chick ain’t feeling it then i just wait. waiting makes it better when you finally do it anyway, you got all that built up, pent up energy. reduces cooldowns too. long fuck sessions every so often are much better then quick blips all the time anyway
    oh oh i almost forgot, i all ready made this post long enough but here’s one more question for ya babe: why do girls like doggy style so much? i’m not saying all girls do, my latest ex, wasnt her favorite, but of the vast majority i ask what their favorite position is, 90% of them answer doggy style by far.

  • Josh Says:

    I think I know that movie… it’s an old one, from the 70’s, right? the “golden age” of porn. It was a restaurant wher you could order anyhting from the menu, sexual or non. I think there was a scene where a group of ladies out to lunch, ordered a a cup of semen on ice and a bunch of waiters cracked off into a goblet…. either that or I making the whole thing up.

  • Christie Cocks Says:

    no, it wasnt actually based on the restaurant, the guy just worked there and then quit his shit job after doin that on the turkey. i dont know what the name of it is, but theres actually a plot to the whole thing and its not totally based on sex like “most” porns. but it def ain’t no R rated movie either. ;) maybe ur actually making the whole thing up LOL - but i bet some where out there - there is a movie like that haha

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